What's New

I've been a little preoccupied for the past 5 weeks, thus no updates to the blog (aside from the repost when MJ went on to the great big stage in the sky). Here's a quick breakdown of what's been going on.

June 18th, 2009 - Brinley Nicole Snyder finally decided to join us. Can I tell you how happy I was to have that be over with? I don't think there are words to describe my elation. As I've mentioned many times before.... never, ever will I do that again. Thankfully she came out cute and perfect. To give an example, she sleeps through the night (starting at 4 days old). Additionally, she appears to be a Taylor baby (as opposed to Joshua who, according to everyone on the planet except me, appears to be a Snyder baby).

I took a month off from work and spent a considerable amount of time sleeping in and lying by the pool. I've got the farmers tan to prove it. Joshua joined the swim team this year, and after about six weeks of prodding, begging, pleading, and forehead slapping (on my part) he is now a pretty decent swimmer. He needs to learn the strokes, but he does a mean doggie paddle, and is getting better each day with freestyle and butterfly. This is a major accomplishment and frankly it trumps me giving birth in the way of big events because we've been trying to get him to swim (in any capacity) for roughly 5 years now.

Katie came to town in early July and has been quite helpful in the way of baby tending and carting Josh around (not to mention she vacuums regularly and will load the dishwasher). Bekir followed earlier this week and we've been enjoying visiting with them.

Unfortunately I won't be going to Taipei in a month due to financial stress and the need for an additional job to pay for childcare. Anyone looking for help in the evenings or weekends should contact me STAT. In lieu of travelling to Taipei I'll be heading back to Gally to cover for Jonathan (who replaced me when I left) so that he can travel to Taipei (I'm only extremely jealous, but not disgruntled).

Memories and Michael Jackson - again

In lieu of the recent passing of Michael Jackson I'm reposting a blog I wrote well over a year ago about how fond I am of his music.

Monday, February 11, 2008
Memories and Michael Jackson
Do you ever forget how much you loved Michael Jackson? No, not recently loved him, but in like 1st grade loved him. When I was in 1st grade, along with many of you - Michael Jackson was da bomb. He was the coolest, most talented, best entertainer out there. We all loved his songs (go ahead, try and deny it), wanted to do the moonwalk like him, and watched Thriller over and over again. Regardless, I'm not on here typing away to convince you of anything.
So, we've established that I loved Michael Jackson as a kid. I continued to enjoy his music even though Michael, as a person, became the exact opposite of someone who I would admire. The music he made during the early 80's, and even the early 90's was great. Catchy tunes that have been sampled and remade time and time again in the current music scene. This is what leads me to this blog and the recent updates to my playlist.
Rhianna's newest radio release has a nice sampling (or pseudosampling) from Wanna Be Starting Something which in turn leads me to think of Michael Jackson, which in turn leads me to think about a very long trip to and from Connecticut with my partners in crime Ron and Cami (and Will was along that trip which made it even better). We didn't always all agree on what should or should not be on the radio, but we all agreed on Michael Jackson. (BTW, Cami or Will if you happen to read this - one of my favoritest memories ever.) This story has already been recapped in a 2 part blog way down my list called "We're supposed to take 95 north," and "We're supposed to take 95 south." (found on my MySpace blog)
Anywho, all this brought me to today when I finally remembered to add some MJ songs to my playlist - along with Rhianna, and some new Chris Brown. When you have nothing better to do, or need the best playlist ever to get you through your day - check it out :)

Quotes

The longest day must have its close—the gloomiest night will wear on to a morning.
Harriet Beecher Stowe (1811-1896)

So I have this little quote widget on my blog (you've probably noticed this already), and it's there as much for me as anyone else. I particularly liked today's quote because it seemed so very applicable to the agony that is my sitting and waiting. To quote about a bazillion other people, "nobody was ever pregnant forever." This is true, but it sure does feel like I've been pregnant forever, and with no actual end in sight it seems that the misery will go on endlessly. One two or three occasions now I've been sure that the end was near. I mean really near. This, only to be disappointed when the end did not in fact show up. I could sit here and list all the reasons why I feel as though I cannot go on another day, but it won't get me anywhere, so I'll just sit here and stew about it to myself.

There are undoubtedly people out there who have no clue I'm about to have a baby. Either they don't keep in touch, or I don't keep in touch, or they don't read my blog, or they don't talk to anyone that I talk to. It's probably for the best. I find pregnancy to be horrific. It's agonizing and painful, uncomfortable and miserable. I can't find one positive thing to say about it other than you get the baby in the end (and then you get a whole new set of agonizing, painful, uncomfortable, and miserable issues). Why people do this on purpose ceases to amaze me. All that being said, if you're one of those people who thinks that pregnancy is so fabulous then you probably do not want to have a conversation with me. I don't care how glorious you thought it was. Frankly, I think you deluded yourself the entire time. My theory on the knows, and the know-nots is simply that I can deal with the knows and probably cannot or do not want to deal with the know-nots. I like them all just the same, it's more a matter of relativity and agreement on the issue at hand.

All that being said - I'm hoping that this ever so long day will have its close (not the actual day, but the theoretical day that has been the last 9 VERY LONG months) soon.

Bathroom Remodeling

Ages ago (like well over a year) we discovered that our bathroom sink was rusted. Not just a little bit rusted, but rusted clear through. In the sink's defense, it is probably the original sink installed in the house in 1973. We discovered the leak while replacing the faucet which also seemed to be the original from 1973 (it too was leaking). Not wanting to get in to anything too massive where bathroom renovations were concerned, Brad was able to just use some plumber's putty to "fix" the leak.
Fast forward a few months. I noticed one day that the bag I'd pulled from under the sink for the trash can was wet. This was slightly disturbing, but it wasn't like it was dripping... just a little damp.
Fast forward a few months (maybe it was even just a few weeks), and Brad realized he'd left some tools under that same sink from when he'd changed out the faucet. He went to fetch them and they were rusted. Further proof that the "fix" was not working.
Finally a couple of weekends back I was pulling yet another bag out from under the sink and noticed that it was wet. No, not damp, actually wet. Water had pooled on the bag, so that when I grabbed it and pulled a small puddle ended up on the floor. This was bad and needed some immediate attention.
I mentioned to Brad that the "fix" was shot and we needed to look in to replacing the vanity. We would probably have opted to replace the sink but previous attempts to disengage the sink from the vanity proved impossible. Plus, the vanity/sink combo was ancient (see part where it's undoubtedly the original from 1973). We'd looked at other vanity/sink combos at Home Depot and Lowe's and found a few that were inexpensive and good looking. Brad and his friend Nick met up, headed to Lowe's and picked up a new one to install. I was very excited, but of course it wasn't going to be easy.
I'd like to note that it has been two weeks now since this project first started and I still have no sink to use in my bathroom. There is an upside to this. While Nick was able to come in, remove the old installation, and begin the process of the new installation, there were more challenges to overcome. The vanity had been flush with the front and right side wall. The new vanity did not want to be flush with anything and when we made it flush it then exposed part of the floor that had never been finished. Everyone had a theory as to how to deal with the flooring issue, but the bigger issue is that the floor just needs to be replaced. It's spongy in places, has a slope in other places, and isn't installed very well regardless.
What was once a simple issue of replacing a sink has now become a bathroom renovation. Not to say that the bathroom doesn't need to be renovated, but frankly I'm short on time here and I'd like to see this done sooner rather than later. I like using the potty closest to me when at all possible, and even though it's only another 10 steps or so to our other bathroom it's a pain.... especially in the middle of the night (for 3 - 4 trips). Brad is now nearly halfway through the process of laying porcelain tile that I picked out. Hopefully he'll finish up the actual tile laying this evening and begin the process of grouting tomorrow. Perhaps when he's finished, and the new sink is in place, and the potty is put back I will post pictures.

The world is full of stupid people

Just when I think things are fine and dandy I find myself right in the middle of numerous situations involving incredibly stupid people. If it was just a single incident I would probably not get all bent out of shape. I'd chalk it up to general stupidity and move along. Unfortunately these things come in waves, and before I know it there's just stupid person after stupid person beating down my door (no, not my actual door, but my door in theory). I don't deal well with stupid people. If they're really dumb and annoying I find myself completely infuriated with the entire situation and I have to do something to remove myself. This becomes a challenge when it's not just one person, but many people and many situations. Why, why are people so incredibly stupid? I just don't understand what makes a 70 year old act like a 4th grader. I also don't understand why you tell someone something specific a bazillion times only to have them act as though you never said anything at all. I do my best to be as specific and detailed as possible to give people the best opportunity to be informed. Why then do they decide to just ignore everything I've said? I'm at a loss, I really am. Days like today make me wanna find a different job and leave it all behind. Sadly, that's really me taking it out on the wrong people. The people AT my actual job have done nothing wrong. It's other people I'm forced to deal with that drive me straight up the wall - and not even all the time, just periodically. Perhaps I need a new approach. I will not answer emails, I will not provide ridiculous amounts of information. Perhaps I'll provide no information. Maybe then people will stop acting so stupid and actually think and act like responsible adults? Probably not, but one can hope.

Fear and Loathing in Babyland

Ok, so we're looking about a 3-4 more weeks of this craziness.... max! This is a good thing. I am sooooooooo ready for this nonsense to be over and feel like an actual human being again. I cannot wait to sit down, stand up, or, God forbid, lie down without it being excruciatingly painful in a variety of ways. More than that - I can't wait for the weight loss to begin. I've come to find that IT has happened to me AGAIN. What is IT you ask? IT happened last time I was pregnant, some 8+ years ago. I look in the mirror and I don't see something all great, but I don't see Shamu. The fact that I don't see Shamu eases my fears about being Shamu and I'm able to go on about my business.... satisfied that I don't need my own zip code. But then the pictures come.... some evil being with a camera takes pictures at an event of some sort and then, and only then, the truth comes out. IT is revealed! I am Shamu! Never mind that I don't see it when I look in the mirror, and nobody has the gumption to tell me (except my boss who says to me the other day, "so you seem to be retaining water", to which I replied, "yes, it's quite nasty, but that's the case"), but regardless I am fat fat the water rat. Now, in my defense, I'd venture my boss has really hit the nail on the head. It's ALOT of water.
It really came on quickly about 10 days ago or so. I'd been just dandy with a bit of swelling, but nothing too horrible. I was able to wear my shoes, and my rings, so those were comforting aspects in my quest to not be Shamu. Then, all of a sudden I couldn't get my feet in to my shoes, and my rings wouldn't come off (mind you, I got them off and haven't put them back on since). I'm truly amazed at how quickly this happened, but happen it did and there's no looking back. I can only hope that I'll be able to ward off the really ugly number on the scale I'd prefer to remain on the left side of, but I don't feel that I have much control over the scale at this juncture.

Just in time for Mother's Day

So, if you know me pretty well you're undoubtedly aware that I have a less than desirable relationship with my mom. It's been this way since I was a little kid, and unfortunately has only gotten worse over the years. I've grown and learned and changed as much as one person normally does over the course of 25 years, but it seems that no matter what I do I am always at odds with my mom.
A little over a year ago things got very bad with my mom and I decided that I had no choice but to just stop speaking to her. She only brought me grief and anxiety and it was extremely difficult to deal with her unreasonable and irrational ways. It didn't only affect me, it affected my husband and kid too. After several months went by I was caught off guard by the auto-answer feature on my phone while driving and was suddenly forced in to conversation with her. I told her what my problems with her were, I explained that I was very unhappy with our relationship and had been for most of my life. She was somewhat sympathetic and said she would like to make things better. After that conversation I went a couple of weeks without speaking to her, but was encouraged by friends and family to try and make amends. I decided that I would call, tell her that I needed to put boundaries on our relationship and tell her what it was that I expected from the relationship. Maybe, just maybe, if she knew what my expectations were then we would be able to go forward. I got up the nerve and called and told her what I had to say. She was happy to hear from me and said she would "do anything to help us have a better relationship." As you might imagine, that entire phone call went right out the window about a week later when she called, completely trampled every boundary I'd set and ignored every expectation I'd described. I was once again at a loss. Still, I tried to make things work, but did not put much effort in to the relationship because I was very tired of being hurt all the time.
Months went by and she continued to get worse. By the holidays I'd really just had it with her once again. I managed to make it through Christmas, but by New Years I decided that I just could not have her be part of my life anymore. She caused me so much stress and anxiety it was difficult to get through the day every time I had to deal with her. When she called in early January I, once again, described to her the problems I had with our relationship and how she managed to not only ignore everything I'd requested of her before, but how she had actually managed to make things much worse. I cited very specific incidents, and noted things that she had said and done that were completely out of line for anyone - especially one's own mother. I told her that I had no desire to speak to her until she got professional help.
She went a few weeks and then took to calling periodically and leaving messages on my voicemail as if nothing were wrong. I ignored her calls because I'd been very clear during our last conversation that I had no desire to speak to her. At one point she called Brad's cell phone very early in the morning, and being startled by it he answered quickly. She asked why I wasn't talking to her and he said she would have to discuss it with me as he wanted to stay out of the middle of it.
Then a few weeks ago she showed up at our house early one Saturday while I was still in bed. Brad did the stupid thing and let her in (he doesn't want to be the bad guy). I got up and sat on the steps and described to her, YET AGAIN, all of the problems that I have with our relationship. I did not get upset, I did not yell, I did not cry, I did not speak with anger or disgust. I just calmly explained that I cannot be in a relationship with someone who treats me so badly. I told her she should not have come to my house and she should not come back again. She needs to seek professional help from a therapist, but for whatever reason, completely refuses to do anything of the sort.
Anyway, yesterday we got an anniversary card in the mail from her with a substantial check. I told Brad we would not be accepting gifts from her as she's only trying buy a relationship with me and that can't be done. I've asked for simple things - for her to treat me like a human being (cause God forbid she treat me like her daughter), and to seek professional counselling for her many issues. I called her to ask why she'd sent the money and see if perhaps she had changed her mind about counselling since our talk a few weeks back. Nope. When I got her on the phone she literally blamed my father for all of the problems that I told her I have with her (mind you he's been dead for 20+ years), and then made really awful and lame excuses for why she's said and done the things she's done. She made conscious choices to not only apologize for her actions, but to defend them in the most outrageous ways.
Once again, I'm done with her. At this point she has really pushed me over the edge and I cannot foresee a change with her at all. No matter what anyone says to her she turns it around and says that it's not her, it's them, or clearly it's someone who has been dead for 20 years.